~from STILL CRAZY AFTER ALL THESE YEARS
There sure is a lot of hype over the new Snow White movie from Disney. I received a call from Snow White a while back who was having a hard time with ageism. Who really knows what goes on in other people’s castles?
(phone rings)
LSJ: Hello? Oh, hello Show White. No, this is a good time. What’s up?
(listening)
LSJ: Why are you bitter? (pause) You say you have grown old and need to live up to the fairy tale standards of looking youthful like in the beginning of your story?
(listening)
LSJ: I know you are not a princess anymore. You are a QUEEN! Think about it…how wonderful to have the wisdom, experience, and influence that age gives you. Not to mention jewels, crowns, prom dresses, and such. (pause) Yes, I know princesses are girlish and queens are old. You can’t expect to be the fairest forever.
(listening)
LSJ: You are thinking about what? Having some work done to help you look fresh again? What kind of work? Won’t it be noticeable?
(listening)
LSJ: No, it’s not Mirror, Mirror’s fault. Everyone would want to look naturally young forever and yes, it’s an impossible fairy tale to live up to.
(listening)
LSJ: Snow, at least you aren’t vain like the last queen. Didn’t Mirror, Mirror say it was exhausting to hear her ask every minute of every day, “Who’s the fairest? Who’s the fairest?” All she wanted was validation. At least you are seeing yourself for what you are.
(listening)
LSJ: I get it. One day you are the darling of the woods and living with seven men in a cottage who adore you. They hung on to every word you spoke and they catered to your every whim. Then, next thing you know, you are what you are: old and no one listens to you. Some people dismiss that you could know anything at all. Ageism! I mean, you are older than me and I don’t even like it!
(listening)
LSJ: Oh, I am sorry. Did I hurt your feelings? Well, let’s get real, Snow. You were in your late teens in 1937 for your debut. I mean, it’s just the circle of life.
(listening)
LSJ: But I understand about having that adoration when you were young. You were definitely one of Disney’s ‘IT’ girls.
(listening)
LSJ: Well, Snow, think long and hard before you decide on surgery. No, you haven’t become desexualized into a matron like Fairy Godmother…yet. But it won’t be long now. Remember, you are over 100. At least you still have a good personality and while in the cottage in the woods, you learned to make all your own clothes and bake apple pies.
And with that, she hung up.
